Tag Archives: Facebook

Two weeks later…

I am really happy with my decision to stop blogging. I have made so many wonderful connections in the virtual world since starting my blogging journey over a year ago, but some balance was much needed and I know I’ve made a very good move.

This final post is just to let y’all know that you can still find The Mindful Mum on Facebook and I would love to see you over there! It’s an interactive page where I’ll keep sharing the things I find that keep me inspired and on my Mindful path, in the hope that they might inspire you too.

~ Pam ~

Isle of Skye, Scotland '09

Isle of Skye, 2009

 

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I choose to disconnect

I was going to write a post this week about the genuine joys of aging, inspired by my last aquazumba class which was attended by some fabulously slim and energetic 18 year olds. I also intended to write my weekly Listmania post today. However, prompted by an article called How to Miss a Childhood, I am cutting down on my online time. Please have a read of the article if you have a mo, and let me know what you think. Judging by the feedback over at The Mindful Mum on Facebook and in my local mothers group online, as well as the comments on the post, a lot of mums, myself included, have found it pretty emotive.

I’m taking a break from blogging for a while. One thing I will really miss is being part of 52 Weeks of Grateful. Remembering to be grateful and making a conscious decision to start from a standpoint of gratitude rather than of dissatisfaction or desire when contemplating my life is one of the greatest lessons I have learned in this blogging journey. I am going to buy a very pretty notebook and turn it into an old-fashioned Gratitude Journal.

I will continue to be Mindful to the best of my ability. I may even finally get around to reading my dusty copy of Mindfulness: Finding Peace in a Frantic World !

Life as the full-time stay at home mum of two little girls is just too busy for me to keep trying to stretch myself in so many directions, and reading that article has made me question my use of social media in general. While my use of my phone is nowhere near as extreme as that described described in the article, my social media time does warrant some analysis, and yesterday I pledged to only use Facebook when they’re both sleeping. By this afternoon in the back of my mind I’m thinking, there are other things I’d like to do with that down time than Facebook and blog. I love to read, why not just get the chores out of the way and read novels every single day, whenever I get a chance? I want to cook more and I’m always thinking I don’t have time. I want to learn more about Buddhism, but I never seem to have time to read Buddhism for Mothers of Young Children. But really, I can make time for whatever I choose.

I choose to disconnect. For a while at least.

Thank you for visiting The Mindful Mum 🙂

 

I’m grateful 5/52

After a pretty hellish week at the coal face of parenting very small children, I suddenly arrive at Sunday and feel utterly at peace with my lot. Probably something to do with the fact that Sunday is our Saturday due to my husband’s work, so this is the start of our weekend. Plus, I got to go out and have my Me Time – a Metaqua class followed by an Ethiopian curry at the market followed by a proper coffee and a short stroll around the mall…all ALONE, gloriously alone 🙂

I’m grateful for my chunk of Me Time. Keeps me from descent into complete FT SAHM lunacy – today I shall just peer at it from afar.

I’m grateful that I get to live in a small town with a big cultural mix. Ethiopian curry at the market followed by coffee picked up at the new European-style deli/cafe today. I can have the best Thai food I’ve ever had outside of Thailand anytime, too. Oh and Vietnamese spring rolls. Indian butter chicken. German bratwurst. This is not a big place by most people’s standards, I think the population including outlying areas is only about 70,000. No Starbucks, no Myers etc. (thankfully!) Small enough that I can have a chat with the Ethiopian lady that made my curry, and bump into a friend while I’m eating it; small enough to have a good talk about cheese with the deli owner’s daughter and to know that every time I go into town chances are I’ll run into someone I know. But still with so very much to offer besides!

I’m grateful that my body is healthy and getting stronger by the day. I walked over 130k in January and I’m aiming for 150k in February. I’m grateful that I have legs that work, unsightly with thread veins though they are! I’d go bonkers if I didn’t exercise. I need the time out and the endorphins! I’m grateful that my husband supports me practically in my efforts to feel empowered and strong via daily exercise.

I’m grateful for my smartphone. I recently discovered the joys of Endomondo via a girlfriend and a group of us mums are doing monthly walking challenges. So motivating and also a lot of fun!

I am grateful for my lovely group of mummy friends and the way we support each other in our efforts to get and stay fit and healthy, and to bring up fit and healthy children.

I’m grateful for the many fabulous connections I’m making in the online world via blogging and Facebook pages. I am learning so much about health, happiness, motherhood, womanhood, possibilties, other worlds, other people’s experiences…

Today is a bloody good day. I’m grateful for that. And it’s not over yet!

I’m linking in with 52 Weeks of Grateful hosted by Maxabella

Happy birthday, blog! How would you feel if I flogged you a lil bit?

In a few short days The Mindful Mum will be one year old – happy first birthday, blog of mine!! I didn’t think you’d last this long, nor that I’d like having you as much as I do. Nor that I’d meet so many lovely, insightful, helpful and inspiring bloggers along the way. Blogging has been such a great experience for me on so many levels!

After a fast paced 2k with the double buggy this lunchtime, I was forced inside by the rain. On finding Miss M still awake – oh, the horror! – I went into a slight trance while pacing the double buggy up and down the lounge room in a desperate attempt to make her nap. I was thinking about having completed one whole year of blogging, and ended up mulling over the idea of trying to make some useful free stuff / lil bit of cash out of my blog. After 15 minutes of trotting around the coffee table and toys, Miss M was asleep and I was thinking hard. Both girls are now asleep but not for long I am sure, so having quickly eaten some lunch (french green lentil cottage pie with rocket salad, nom nom!) I am just going to do a quick brain dump here and see what comes out!

I’m really not sure where I stand on sponsored posts. I have unsubscribed from several blogs in recent months because they seemed to be just flogging stuff all the time and I missed their regular posts. I remember one week I got about four posts in my inbox telling me how important and wonderful life insurance is, especially if I went with this one particular broker, and each one ended with an almost identical line saying it was all the blogger’s own opinion etc etc. Each to their own and more power to you, but that’s not for me.

I would limit the number of posts dedicated to any kind of “monetization”. One blog I liked a lot seems to only write sponsored or giveaway posts now and that’s not the direction I want to head in. Although again, more power to them 🙂

I don’t expect to make wads of cash but it would certainly be nice to make enough to buy books with now and then (I am always wanting to add to my stash of household management and organisation tomes – I feel so good and organised when I purchase them and they look so nice on my shelves!). So I’m thinking about the affiliate route, starting with Amazon or Book Depository. Maybe some ebook affiliations too, I’ve seen a few around.

I would also quite like some useful free stuff! Who wouldn’t? Come on, be honest! 😉 I had a very lucky year in the giveaway stakes in 2012 and won heaps of prizes, mostly from other blogs. I only enter for things I’d really like to win and it’s generally things for the home or for my girls, or stuff like toiletries and sunscreen that are useful for all the family. Oh and I’ve won several books for me, which was lovely! I’m told that you don’t necessarily need to be a big blog in order to “connect” with brands so maybe it’s something I could look into. I’d want to keep it relevant though e.g. we don’t play computer games and I’m not into certain kinds of toys and dolls. I’d be steering clear of anything that’s not within my value system or lifestyle.

Of course I’d need more exposure and more traffic to do any of the above. I’d have to flog my blog. So I’d definitely need a Facebook page for The Mindful Mum and therein lies part of my dilemma. Firstly, I’m not sure I’m ready to “out” my blog to all my friends and family, as only a select few know that I blether about my life and random thoughts on the internet and although I’m not yet sure, I think if I had a page it would be known to those who are my friends on my personal page? Secondly, I’m not sure I want to be spending more time on Facebook.

Hmmm…

OK, my time is up!

I’d love to know your thoughts on this topic, either as a blogger or reader of blogs, or both! Thank you 🙂

#reverb12 Day 26: How will you make time?

How very apt that today’s #reverb12 prompt should be about making time! When both my children are sleeping, as they are now, I feel I have a modicum of control over things. The rest of the time, not so much! I am told that things will get easier, and I know it is true, but right now I’m in the thick of it with a toddler and a breastfeeding five week old. My time is not my own to prioritse beyond making sure I eat properly. Sleeping is rather outwith my powers as I grab what I can between night feeds. As for “sleep when the baby sleeps” during the day, well that’s all very well until you have more than one child – and a burning desire for a little bit of time to yourself when a small miracle happens and they are both asleep at the same time!

{24 hours later}

How do you intend to carve out more time for the things that are the most important to you in 2013?

1, Get up 30 minutes before husband leaves for work regardless of who else is asleep so I have time to shower, dress, put on a load of washing and eat some cereal, so I can start the day in a better frame of mind to PLAY! Because my children are what’s most important to me and they need me to play with them, not be a frazzled, distracted wreck first thing.

2, Start expressing in about 8 weeks so that husband can be left alone with the baby as well as Miss M and I can get out on my own now and then – primarily so I can start running again. It’s really important to me that I start running again – so very good for my mental health and also I really want to lose the baby weight and get myself back in shape. One of my 2013 goals is to take part in our local running festival in September, either 10k or half marathon, and serious training will be required.

3, Whenever I chance to have both girls sleeping at the same time in the afternoon, after eating (always most important) I will take 30 minutes just to sit down and read a book or blog or sew or watch something on the iViewer instead of runninga round doing chores. It’s most important that I get some me time to avoid burnout  –  and just to stay smiling for my family!

4, Stop obsessively checking Facebook, so many hours are sucked away!!! There are so many other things that are more important to me. Facebook has become a bit of a bad habit – I so appreciate the connection during my SAHM day-to-day, but I don’t need quite so much, and that time can be much better spent. I intend to disconnect from social media more in 2013, because pretty much everything is more important than Facebook and Twitter!

And now, my time is up!

This post is part of #reverb12 hosted by Kat at I Saw You Dancing

Forgetting to be grateful

I lost sight of things a little bit last night. Well ok, a lot. It was a long 12 hours with Miss M yesterday, and by the time my husband got home I was feeling pretty resentful. It’s been a while since this emotion had a good hold on me. Knowing as I do how destructive it is, I’ve worked hard these past 9 months on cultivating a mindful attitude of gratitude and ridding my life of pointless resentments. After all, that was the whole point of this starting this blog! But, a very wilful and energetic toddler, anaemia and 7 months of pregnancy have left me a little bit, shall we say, frayed at the edges, and it all came to a head at bedtime. Started with a passionate speech about the utter unfairness of men not being able to physically bear children. Yeah, I know. In hindsight I do feel a little bad for my husband in the face of that little vent! Ended in much snot and tears, related to fear that I will be unable to cope with a newborn and a crazy toddler with a husband that works long hours, and expressed in loud anger and resentment toward him for not having instant miracle answers and always saying the wrong thing. He is so not a bad husband, he’s a bloody brilliant husband. Evidenced by the fact that after a rather heated exchange (well, he’s only human…) and despite all that vitriol, the whole thing ended in cuddles at about 3am when I snuck back into bed from my (rather uncomfortable) point of principle in the spare room.

Awoke this morning feeling drained and puffy, and whilst having a cup of tea in bed alone (thank you lovely husband!) I came across a wonderful article via Twitter by Leo Babauta called  The Only Way to Respond to Life, extract here:

We often not only take life for granted, but complain about it…but goodness, look around you! What a wonder life is! If only we would take the time to see it, to really appreciate it, and to applaud. This moment is a ridiculously generous miracle. Give it up, folks, for life.”

And that was the boot up the ass I needed to get me out of bed and into the day. I got things back in perspective. Sometimes I think there’s too much social media in my life, and I need to cut back. Other times, as happens so often, I find a little gem – a quote or a short article – in my Twitter or Facebook feeds, and I remember what a wonderful tool social media can be. It’s all about moderation, of course. Less trawling through the crap and discussing nonsense, more constructive learning and sharing is the way forward.

Meantime, note to self, or rather, promise – every single day I will remember to stop, and be grateful. It really is the only constructive way to respond to life – especially when the going is rough.

Grateful for…techonology

This week the 52 Weeks of Grateful theme is technology. This is not a hard one for me! My home country is on the other side of the world, and I am ever grateful that the internet enables me to keep in touch and share with friends and family so easily. As a stay at home mum, I’m grateful for social networking because it prevents me from feeling isolated on days like today when I’m just too tired to go out and interact. However, I do believe there needs to be a balance between online communication and healthy IRL relationships and activities, and I try to be vigilant and mindful at all times in ensuring that my amount of screen time of all types is healthy. Which is why this is going to be a short post, as I need some real chill time that’s not screen time this afternoon while Miss M sleeps!

I have one final reason to be grateful for technology this week though – on Tuesday it will, all being well, allow me to see and maybe even hear my new baby’s heartbeat! It’s VERY early days but I’m happy to report that I was too hasty in my earlier post, and the next day I got a positive test result. I’m one happy, hopeful, mindful mum right now!

This post is part of the 52 Weeks of Grateful link-up hosted by Maxabella Loves 

Facebook Disconnect

Over breakfast this morning I read an article in Wellbeing magazine (February 2011) about mindful eating. My relationship with food and body image is something I’ll leave for another time because what really struck me today was the following:

The fastest way to increase your awareness of yourself, your moods and those around you is to switch off electronically and from information sources.

I immediately thought of my relationship with Facebook. Most of my IRL social life is organised via Facebook groups so it would be impractical disconnect myself completely. However,  I also spend a lot of time just browsing and commenting and basically, well, timewasting. In fact I daren’t work out how many hours a day I spend on it if I include my late night browsing through sewing groups and joining in mummy chat. I had already checked in before breakfast but resolved not to touch it again until late afternoon. I didn’t suffer overly and got a lot more done that I would have otherwise – but when I logged in at 4pm WHOOOOSH I was sucked right in and before I knew it a whole half hour was gone, on nothing in particular. Being mindful of this morning’s reading I shut the machine down completely and haven’t been back in since. I’ll check for updates on tomorrow’s scheduled mothers group event, but I will not take my phone to bed and browse.

My goal is to limit Facebook to 20 minutes morning and evening, which is still way to much when I see it there in black and white, but it’s a start. It’s time to become more mindful of how I spend my precious time!

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